For years I've wondered why we feel the urge to compare our Ex's new person to ourselves. Why?

We compare body type, facial beauty or attractiveness, style of dress but taking it further we do the whole social media search. I'm telling you, the FBI or Secret Service could hire some of us with the serious super sleuthing skills we possess! You KNOW you've done it, haha, I'll admit I've done it too. Men, don't laugh because you do it too and some of you are probably in the process of doing it right now!

Again, I ask why? Does it really matter who they're with after us? Maybe it's a matter of closure or us wanting to know where we didn't measure up? Should we improve? There are many questions here but the main one I will focus on is:

"Why tear the NEXT down just because you're the EX?" Truth is she/he could be the most gorgeous person EVER or look like the Blobfish- it does not matter! What matters is that they're NOT with you (us). I don't mean to be harsh but what I want us to understand is that it's not necessarily a bad thing. Both of you have the possibility to do better, clearing opportunity for the PERFECT ONE FOR YOU to come into your life. Take note that I said "perfect for you" not "perfect person". No one is perfect but some people just FIT together.

Below are lyrics from a song but they're all too familiar in everyday conversation. I cannot tell you the amount of times I've heard something like this and I will admit, I have succumb to it in the past. ("She Can't Love You" by Destiny's Child)

Could we all agree that looking behind takes the focus off of moving ahead? I think we could. So why stay focused on the Ex and their new "Boo"? They've moved on and so should you! Don't get me wrong, a broken or bruised heart needs time to heal and that's the reason you should NEVER jump right into another relationship after a breakup. Spend that time learning more about yourself, going after dreams, planning your life, finishing things you've started, reconnecting with family and friends, etc. If you don't do any of this you run the risk of looking pathetic, dependent and lost BUT you're stronger than that!

It's true some of us really do need Boyfriend/Girlfriend Rehabilitation Services... There might be an app for that! (haha)

After you get the 'app' and have begun to heal its time to let go of them, both your Ex and the unhealthy obsession with the new love interest. Take time to evaluate the relationship you had. What was the good you would like to keep and enjoy in another relationship? What was the bad that you will not and cannot accept? What did you bring to the table and what can you now bring to the table (after you've had time to yourself- being a BETTER YOU)? Lastly, what are some things you expect your future mate to bring to the table? (Keep in mind, people have faults so expecting absolute perfection is ludicrous).

I want to hear from you, COMMENT below.

On Saturday I had the time of my life! No, I was not at the Beyonce concert; I went somewhere better. More than being the old "naughty girl" living what I used to believe was a "sweet dream beautiful... nightmare" I spent 4 glorious hours Coming Together with others who believe, like I do, that God Belongs in Our City. I put God's love on top.

The line up was incredible: first we got started with praise and worship lead by Amante Lacey.

The song lyrics "let our worship kiss Your face in this atmosphere"... Soul stirring. Just meditate on that for a moment. Think on how glorious it is to know that God delights in our worship, pure and simple adoration. [pause to let it sink in] Check out www.amantelacey.com

Then we got amped with HeeSun Lee! This woman right here is hilarious and talented! In her words: "I don't know if you noticed but ummm I'm Asian." I don't know if she noticed but ummm she's on point! Tracks like "Life's Too Short" (something new off of her, I'm assuming, forthcoming album *hoping hard*), "I Get In", "Cindy's Revenge" and "Breaking All the Rules"- which has become my self-proclaimed motto- had the entire audience on their feet "Breaking Stereotypes"! Oh and did I mention I got to meet her???! Humble, sweet and just plain gorgeous! You would kick yourself for not checking her out sooner, I know I did. Here's a nudge: www.inmycityrecords.com

Okay, so by now our minds were flooded with the amazingness of God. We worshipped with simplicity and solemness of heart then we jumped for joy with the realization that we are Christians and we aren't cookie cutter editions. What could possibly be next?

Christon Gray, that's what! Out came this guy looking uniquely cool. I honestly didn't know what he was going to do but I was ready! Then he opened his mouth and notes came out so beautifully they were almost visual. When he asked us to repeat lyrics after him we did, UNTIL he took it to another level! I'm telling you God can do some 'thangs' with vocal chords. I tried to follow his effortless lead but I sounded more like a dying mouse so I shut up and let him do his thing (haha). "Hit those notes my brother! Go 'head!" I shouted instead. As he shared background to songs and a beautiful heartfelt dedication to his wife and daughter we swayed and collectively said "awwww" okay so that was mainly the women in the audience, leave me alone. Just when I thought he was only a singer in between rap artists, he surprised us by doing both. Talent upon talent. You'd be wise to visit: http://collision-records.com/discography/christon-gray-body-art/

It was surprise after surprise. The next performer you may recognize from several rap battles and even some movie appearances (hint hint: 2 Fast 2 Furious where he played Jimmy). You guessed it, MC Jin! Some might have thought he lost his spark since he became a Christian, WRONG! He got even better! Come battle him now... Eh, better not, no sense melting your face. Let the Son do that. His song "Dear, Non-Believer" is something serious! Check out his album here: www.crazyloveridiculousfaith.com

By this time I was drenched in sweat, let's call it holy sweat, don't judge me haha. My feet were hurting but I kept jumping and dancing, shouting praises to God. I could barely contain the excitement that had accumulated throughout the evening and just then Andy Mineo came out!

As soon as I heard "Come you sinners poor and needy"... I KNEW what time it was but I couldn't decide whether I should keep my shoes on or off; I just knew it was about to get real! From Superhuman to The Saints to Uno Uno Seis I thought I was a rapper! Word for word, creating actions to lyrics- I was going HARD! Momma would have been so proud :) . In the midst of this splendiferous time there was worship. When Andy performed "You Will"I paused in worship to acknowledge God's worthship, His grace and mercy. When others doubt we, as children of God, have the privilege of knowing that Abba Father is more than able. (Side note: I was startled by Andy's cold water that hit me in the face and neck hahaha but I ain't mad atcha).

All in all it was an amazingly awesome-tastic event! With each performing minister (artist) praying in between their sets we were reminded of the purpose of our attendance. God belongs in our city!

It is not too late to catch this tour. It's all across the country with various artists, so catch one near you! Here's the link for info: www.GodBelongsInMyCity.com

DO NOT MISS OUT ON THIS!