"I Saw Your New Love. I'm Better." Really???

For years I've wondered why we feel the urge to compare our Ex's new person to ourselves. Why?

We compare body type, facial beauty or attractiveness, style of dress but taking it further we do the whole social media search. I'm telling you, the FBI or Secret Service could hire some of us with the serious super sleuthing skills we possess! You KNOW you've done it, haha, I'll admit I've done it too. Men, don't laugh because you do it too and some of you are probably in the process of doing it right now!

Again, I ask why? Does it really matter who they're with after us? Maybe it's a matter of closure or us wanting to know where we didn't measure up? Should we improve? There are many questions here but the main one I will focus on is:

"Why tear the NEXT down just because you're the EX?" Truth is she/he could be the most gorgeous person EVER or look like the Blobfish- it does not matter! What matters is that they're NOT with you (us). I don't mean to be harsh but what I want us to understand is that it's not necessarily a bad thing. Both of you have the possibility to do better, clearing opportunity for the PERFECT ONE FOR YOU to come into your life. Take note that I said "perfect for you" not "perfect person". No one is perfect but some people just FIT together.

Below are lyrics from a song but they're all too familiar in everyday conversation. I cannot tell you the amount of times I've heard something like this and I will admit, I have succumb to it in the past. ("She Can't Love You" by Destiny's Child)

Could we all agree that looking behind takes the focus off of moving ahead? I think we could. So why stay focused on the Ex and their new "Boo"? They've moved on and so should you! Don't get me wrong, a broken or bruised heart needs time to heal and that's the reason you should NEVER jump right into another relationship after a breakup. Spend that time learning more about yourself, going after dreams, planning your life, finishing things you've started, reconnecting with family and friends, etc. If you don't do any of this you run the risk of looking pathetic, dependent and lost BUT you're stronger than that!

It's true some of us really do need Boyfriend/Girlfriend Rehabilitation Services... There might be an app for that! (haha)

After you get the 'app' and have begun to heal its time to let go of them, both your Ex and the unhealthy obsession with the new love interest. Take time to evaluate the relationship you had. What was the good you would like to keep and enjoy in another relationship? What was the bad that you will not and cannot accept? What did you bring to the table and what can you now bring to the table (after you've had time to yourself- being a BETTER YOU)? Lastly, what are some things you expect your future mate to bring to the table? (Keep in mind, people have faults so expecting absolute perfection is ludicrous).

I want to hear from you, COMMENT below.

"She's Not An American. Why Did She Win???"

Nina Davuluri, an Asian-American, is an American!

From the time she uttered those words to remark that she and her fellow pageant mate are "Asian-Americans" Twitter, Facebook and a slew of other social media has been set ablaze with ignorance.

In actuality, Nina Davuluri embodies what America truly is- a combination of many cultures living under one oath, the Pledge of Allegiance. We are not a melting pot anymore, we are a mixed salad! Cultures come and adapt to living conditions but never lose sight of who they are and that's excellent.

So if you have a problem with that I suggest you cook at home and NEVER go out for take out- No Italian, Chinese, Thai, West Indian/Caribbean, NONE OF IT! The only thing that I've heard was an all American dish was 'The Apple Pie' and even that isn't. It's European! Apples did not exist here until they were brought over and trees were planted. http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/2369851 (Oh and that blurb about offending the devoutly "religious" - I'm not religious I'm a Christian so I know God created nature and creature before mankind. Confused you? Ask me about it sometime.)

In addition to cooking your own meals, you should also learn to make your own clothes, rear your own children, maintain your households on your own, do your own yard work, stop traveling, and use ABSOLUTELY NOTHING imported. Sounds absurd? Well so do the the thousands of people who share the opinion that if you aren't white you're not right or in this case "American". By the way, America was named after an Italian explorer named Amerigo Vespucci. http://www.loc.gov/wiseguide/aug03/america.html

I've said it before and I'll say it again, the ONLY people who have a right to say ANYTHING regarding anyone's origins in THIS COUNTRY are the NATIVES (I won't call them Native American because for them this land was NOT America). Truth is, if every family in this country did a DNA family search they'd ALL have hyphens added to their "American". We all hail from SOMEWHERE and are now blessed to call this land our home.

(Above: Miss California, Crystal Lee, excellently executing her ballet routine)

(Above: Miss New York before becoming Miss America, Nina Davuluri, wowing the crowd with her beautiful Bollywood inspired dance routine- I LOVED IT!)

If you're angry, too bad. If you're happy about it, great! Vent on this post, I want to read what you have to say. Comment.

Miss America 2014... Weigh In!

Weigh in. The 2014 Miss America Competition is being aired right now!

I watch for the purpose of entertainment and to cheer for my state or at the very least the most likable candidate (in my opinion). I'd never thought about it as demeaning or as a setback in the women's / feminist movement.

{Note: There are some absolutely brilliant and talented women who take part in this competition and ones just like it. For them it may just be the propellant they need to effect positive change in this country and world. Don't judge these competitions on their faces, go deeper. Don't believe me? Google Faith Jenkins.}

Alright, I'll climb down from my soapbox now and ask your opinions.

Soooo, are you watching the competition? What is your opinion about such competitions?

Sound off!

I'm Turning What????!

It's a bit early but it dawned on me that my birthday is FAST approaching! Before I know it, I'll be (muffles mouth) !$@;t%* years old... Ehem, I mean young!

I've always said that I'd be that woman who proudly states her age even at 100- I still stand by that statement buuut by nature I've come to an age of evaluation. I find myself sitting and thinking about my accomplishments, dreams I thought would come true by now- some have changed and others replaced. I'm a woman so I can't help but think about whether I will have children or not. Marriage? Haha! Wait, was that out loud? Oh well, sometimes you just have to laugh at yourself.

I ask myself sometimes "have you done all you've wanted?" It would be nice if I got an answer but the silence tells me that I've stressed for no apparent reason! My life has just begun! I was tripping all the way out. I have time as long as God gives me breath. So dreams and visions will become true!

All the rest, like a husband and babies, well, let's wait and see shall we? I'm in no rush. Until then, like my mother says [insert Caribbean accent here] "free paper not burn!" (Meaning: I do not have any life changing responsibilities.) ;)

Now back to your regularly scheduled program...